ADHD X 2

I recently posted a guest post on ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) & ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). Upon posting the article I decided to share my own struggles with ADHD in my household. I have two children with moderate and severe ADHD. My oldest was diagnosed in Kindergarten and my youngest will be going through the evaluation in August but I already know what is going to be determined because I've already been through it.

I knew when my daughter was 3 that there was something very off with her behavior. I know, every child goes through the "terrible twos" but this was different. From birth she was a very hyper stimulated child and had severe colic when she was an infant. The tantrums continued into toddler years and progressively got worse, horrific and constant. They often ended with both of us in tears and me feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. When she was 3 I reached out to the local Area Education Agency to have her evaluated and they deemed her "spirited" and handed me a book about time outs. Really?! You don't think I tried that? It wasn't until she was 5 and in Kindergarten causing major problems in the classroom that they were finally saying what I knew all along- she had ADHD and needed medication.

A lot of people knock the ADHD diagnosis and parents who medicate. They're usually the people whose children don't have ADHD. They don't realize that it doesn't just affect the child who has it, but it affects the entire family, and it affects other people's children in the classroom. When a child with ADHD is present everything tends to be very chaotic and disruptive and usually the teacher has to spend a great deal of time trying to wrangle that one child under control every day, all day.

Medicating my daughter was a tough decision but one I don't regret at all. She's now 13 and flourishing in school, she was on A/B honor roll the last two years! The medication works so well that I can tell within 5 minutes of being around her whether she has taken her pill or not. It's like night and day difference.

My youngest's story is very similar but his is more severe than my daughter's was. We knew about the age of 18 months that there was a problem. We actually had him evaluated for Autism and other spectrum disorders because of his behavior. While we don't have a definite diagnosis yet, I know that it will be ADHD.

Being a mom to two children with ADHD isn't easy and there are a lot of stigmas that you have to fight between the schools, other parents, and usually anyone with an opinion. The key to keeping your sanity and helping your child is finding a really good doctor and being open and honest with teachers and other parents. People seem to be less cruel and more understanding when you tell them what the issues are and that you want to be informed of any concerns immediately.

Left Behind...

I was recently called in for a conference by my daughter's 1st grade teacher. Not having any problems brought to my attention prior to the conference, I went in expecting to hear good things. I was shocked and upset by what I was told.

After saying hello to the teacher I sat down. Normally when I've met for conferences it was always one on one, parent and teacher only. I got a bad feeling when two other women walked into the room each carrying a pretty thick folder. The feeling got worse when the teacher began with "She's a joy to have in class, so sweet and friendly, but...". My heart sank, here it comes my first bad parent/teacher conference.

The teacher started telling me that my daughter is really struggling with reading. She began showing me test scores and they were horrible, I couldn't believe it. The school year is almost over and this is the first I've heard about the fact that my child can hardly read, and has been working with three other teachers, 4 days out of the week for over two months! I was pissed and sad for my daughter at the same time because I had no idea. Needless to say with all the extra help at school she is still struggling.

We've been doing a lot of extra reading at home since the conference and I just found out she can get free tutoring through the district so we are starting that next week. Also she is set to attend a 6 week intensive reading camp. Until this we really had no reading routine at our house. I read to my kids a lot but not every day until now. Now my oldest reads for 30 minutes by herself and then my youngest daughter reads aloud to me for 30 minutes. If you are having reading troubles with your kids or just want to avoid problems here are some tips on how to get a routine going.

Pick a Theme
Getting the whole family involved is important. Having different age groups means different reading levels. Picking a theme makes it easier to be able to talk about what you are reading about.

Set a Time
Set a time aside for the whole family to read together. This has been one of my favorite parts because it's great quality family time.

Create a Space For Reading
There's nothing better than curling up with a good book, a blanket, and some cocoa. We've designated our bed as our reading area. This way there's room for everyone cuddle up and enjoy a story! The kids are comfy and so are hubby and I!

Have Fun
Hubby and I often read out loud together. He does all the boy parts and I do all the girl parts. We get into it and create voices for the characters and this gets the kids attention too, they really get into the story.

Talk About the Story
When you're finished reading, talk about it with your kids. This helps you gauge their comprehension of what was read.

Reward
Reward your kids for reading! If they read a certain number of books in a month maybe give them a gift card to the bookstore or credit for their Nook/Kindle to get more books.

Reading is so important! Encourage it, feed it, don't let your kid get left behind.